saving me

why is it that people think life is easy, that everything will turn out okay? what about all the people that comment suicide will everything turn out right for them. i dont really know how to put what im thinking right now. i guess it has something to do with life, mixed with love. can people live with out love, or do they just wash away day by day? i want to know if someone can survive on their own, with no one beside them just themselves, and there wits. or do we have to have someone beside us, saying i love you, and ill care for you, forever. in the last few months i have been told the same thing, i love you. but the sad part of it, is they dont know me. they dont know anything about me, and yet they love me. i dont see how this is possible. for me it takes months sometimes years, for me even to say your my friend. if you last with me that long, i would die for you, because you would matter to me.

how is it that someone you barely know can say those words, that mean so much, like it doesnt matter. they dont realize what those words mean. i have never told a guy i love you, because i cant get close to them, because it takes me so long to become friends with someone, that most people give up on that feeling. it is so hard to see someone you like walk away because you arent ready. but i guess it all turns out well because you never have to be hurt. if they cant wait for you, then they arent worth it.

this past year i have learned so much, about me, life, love. i first learned that you cant just say i love you like it means nothing, then i found out love is complicated, its not you find a guy and you can just wing it. it doesnt that way, you have to work for it, and sometimes, most of the times your let down. the next thing i found out, is that no matter how much you want time to stop, to just make it last a little bit longer, it wont, because life always goes on, no matter what you do. the last thing i learned and probably the most important, never change your self, never think that you need someone to live with you, and always belive in your self.